September 04, 2006 - 7:17 p.m.

Dear Diary,
Do not automatically think that beauty always has to be defined by old-fashioned standards, Stacy. It is time to set your own definition. There is no need to squeeze yourself into some socially constructed mold that doesn't resonate with who you truly are. Your job is not to try and make sure that everyone loves you. There is only one person you need to satisfy, and that is yourself.
It finally seems that the summer has come to an end and with that so many new and exciting, and also scary things are about to take place. The summer and a fast moving time and I can honestly say that it was amazing. I started the summer out by working at a local daycare here in Kitchener on May 2nd which was the day after I wrote my last exam. Sometime after that my parents and I began our long and exhausting process of looking for my own apartment so that I could leave from Greg's mom's place. At the time she wasn't working and still has two of her own sons there to take care of and I think most importantly I had wore out my welcome since I had already been there for two years. We ended up finding a nice one bedroom apartment a few months afterwards in downtown Kitchener near City Hall and the Bus Terminal (not to mention everywhere else downtown for all that I need) in what mom refers to as an old brown stone building which you would find in New York. My apartment has all original wood floors and the original doors that would have had the skeleton keys for them. Although it's not the biggest apartment in the world, it is a pretty nice space for me. It suits me I suppose. I took possession of it on July 27th but I didn't move in until the 29th so I could wait for the weekend and the help from others. So I've now been here for just over a month and it's not soo bad. Every once and a while I have a neighbour who turns the music up to much or a couple who fights like crazy but I guess part of that is expected for living right downtown near all the bars and what not. Overall though, it's really not that bad. I miss Greg like crazy all the time and finding myself thinking more about the little things that you kind of push away in your head to think about for a rainy day. I just miss him so much and want him here all the time and I know that sometimes I take advantage of him and the situation and sometimes push him to come over when I know that he wants time to himself.
We had our family reuinion/suprise buck and doe for my brother and carolann this weekend on Saturday. Everything went so well once it was all put together and everyone arrived. It was so nice to see uncle John, aunt Linday, Sheyleen, David, Brant, Derek and Liz. It's been so long since the whole family has been together since Derek and Liz live in Saskatchewan and the others listed live in Nova Scotia. We ended up raising $1300 for Kirk and Carolann too which I think they will put together for their honeymoon. I also start my oreintation tomorrow at the University. I'm really not sure how much of it I am actually going to stay for but I'm going to go for a bit of it at least. Wednesday morning though I am writing my ELPE (English Language Proficiency Exam) which lasts for 50 minutes. They give you a random topic and you are given the 50 minutes to write a typical essay with an introductory paragraph, three main paragraph's, and a closing paragraph. They are looking for approximately 300-500 words as well. I'm getting more and more nervous as the day approaches but I'm just trying hard now not to think too much about it and just concentrait on doing my best no matter what happends during it. I'm just hoping that I do well and get through it without many problems! Let's hope things go good! Aside from all this, I'm trying desperately once again to get in contact with Alicia. I'm not sure if she has finally moved in with her friend and her son or what and I keep calling her mom's place but I'm not getting no where. I miss her dearly and I just hope that things are ok and that she's not mad at me. I miss you Alicia. I can't stand not talking to you, especially for this long at a time. Please, if you read this, contact me in some way or form! Take care love and know that I'm thinking about you and Gavin. I guess that I should end all this off here. I've got to get some work done before tomorrow. I've also got to be up early for the orientation part so it meens getting to bed early. I hope that everyone is doing good and taking care. Keep in touch!
*love always stacy*

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