August 30, 2003 - 11:43 a.m.

Dear Diary,

Dear STACY,

Have you been doing a lot of walking lately? If so, STACY, you might find that your feet are sore, tired, and in need of a rest. This is apt to affect your energy level considerably, not to mention your ability to get any work done. Try to concentrate on routine tasks that require little thought and also can be done sitting down. And stay out of any squabbles! In the evening: relax in a hot tub.

I'm more then relieved to see this week go by now. Its been one hell of a week that has pulled me emotionally and physically in every possible way. My week started out where I had to call the doctor and was afriad that he would send me to the hospital, well I go and see the docotor on the 5th of September so I guess then I will see what he says and if I get sent to the hospital well then I won't be to happy. Then, Saturday afternoon I broke my glasses when I went to clean them so I havn't had my glasses all week. Sunday night I went to feed Molly and give her fresh water and check up on her and everything like I usually do around 9:30pm and she was stil inside of her house just laying there but she moved when I went to pet her so instead of continue to bug her I thought that I would leave her be and just let her sleep until she was good, well and ready to get up to have her food and water. Monday, I had to get up at 6:40am to go babysitting for this one lady down the street so when I got up in the morning I checked on Molly and noticed that she hadn't touched any of her food so I opened up the lid to her little house and found out that she had passed away over night some time and was still in the same small tight warm ball that she was in the night before when I had checked on her then. I was heart broken and went downstairs crying to tell my dad. Then it was off to babysitting here I was crying on and off all day when I went to the bathroom. When I got home from babysitting I went and got a small box, Molly and the shovel and took everything outside to the back on the grass and burried her in what I thought would be the best spot. When I went to place her inside of the box though she began gasping for air and her whole body was shaking so I tried to hand feed her some water with the tube feeder. This went on for quite some time, nearly 10-15 minutes and then I watched her take her last breath and her legs and arms went limp. She just lay there so I told her that I loved her and would never forget her and that she would go up to hampster heaven where she would meet new friends. I placed the box inside the whole that I dug and again told her I loved her and then covered her up with dirt. I've been heart broken all week and can't seem to feel a whole lot better.

Tuesday I had to babysitt down the street until 4:30pm and then at 7:00pm I had to go to another place across town to babysitt for another lady and that lasted until 11:00pm. When I called Greg on Tuesday he sounded horrible like he was crying and conjested so I asked him what was the matter and he said that he didn't know. He told me that the upper part of his body was burning hot and the lower part was freezing, his whole body hurt as if he had just finished doing a very intesive workout and every muscle hurt extreemly bad, it was sometimes hard to breath, his head and his eyes felt like that had so much pressure on them that they would explode and he had a headach. Oh course...I was worried sick. His mom was coming over to his place at 9:30 to stay with him and try to get him to feel better so I let him go and then called again at 11:00 when I got home where I found out that his temperature had gone up since I ast talked to him. We didn't talk long so then on Wednesday when I called he was feeling a lot better then what he did the night before but still not back to himself 100%. Wedneday, I had to yet again be up early to go babysitting so in the morning I took the boys for a walk where we went and mailed the letter I wrote to Alicia and then we went to the park and I let them play for a while before walking back home so I could get them their lunch. Tarry should up shortly afterwards when we were outside in the backyard and asked if I wanted to take the bus down to Kitchener for the afternoon at 4:15 with him and another one of his friends to go shopping and I would have so I could have went and seen Greg but I was still working at that point so I wasn't able to. Thursday, I got up and got dad to drive me to the bus station at 8:40am so I could buy my bus ticket and go to kitchener for the day to spend with Greg. Once I got to the bus station I called and Greg came to pick me up and just went back to his place after getting coffee. We ended up going for a long walk to the store and then later on got pizza for dinner and then dad came to pick me up at 11:30. Yesterday, I spent the intire day cleaning up the house. The weekly ritual of cleaning had began yet again for me. I managed to get all the dusting and the vaccuming done in the intire house and then did some work on my room by trying to re-organize and clean things up some.

As far as today goes, granny just came to pick me up not too long ago so I could go and pick up my new glasses because mom is working and dad left early this morning to go to Grand Bend to go and watch the drag races. I have to call tarry at 12:30 to wake him up again and then hes coming into town to come and pick me up so we can go to the mall for the day. I think I might also get a new pet today too. Possibly a baby bunny. I'm not too sure yet though. lol, it could be a big shocker if I were to just bring it home without asking first though. Ah well. We'll see. So my week as you can see has been long and exhausting. I'm glad its finally over. Everyone goes back to school on tuesday, but not me! :) I need to find out when I start my at home online course though and I imagine that will be soon. Thats all for now, I'll write soon.

*love always stacy*

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